Pondering.. to diversify a little from the previous post…

Central top of fireplace
Labels.. everyone seems to have them these days.. meaning to me..? To be pigeonholed to fit in with the system’s criteria… Labels have their place.. I totally agree… Such labels being brought to my attention and my own experiences have led me over the years to read extensively just about everything on the spectrum to do with the mind… How else could I get to know the people of this world and also what was going on within myself… I am NOT a label though.. I am a person.. an individual.. unique and doing just fine… 🙂
Perception… a persons view on things.. of life.. how they perceive another person to be…
I never had the ” help or support ” from anyone really to deal with my experiences and emotions attached and I’ve been in some dark places.. believe me.. I was so wrongly programmed.. I don’t use the term damaged.. the word itself has negative vibes.. like the person is less than.. damaged goods.. it’s not on in my world.. any term that does a person down isn’t… How the hell can that heal someone or make them feel good about themselves..?
I was wrongly programed and not equipped properly to deal with life.. I set about reprogramming myself.. because there was no one else to do it but myself and I had the responsibility of two children too… To break the chains you really do need to look within and I did this extensively for years… I also balmed the wounds with my creativity…
I had the word CPTSD thrown at me a year or so ago by the last person who decided that with my past experiences.. that I must have it… Again I went researching and reading up about the condition… I would never dismiss others opinions nor minimise the effects of this or any other condition in any way… I do have elements of it.. I call them legacies.. I don’t go out much.. my group of friends is small and I do get very anxious in new situations or if I feel people are judging or assuming things about me… Just because I haven’t gone down the conventional path of the system though.. ( made up by people just like myself by the way ) DOES NOT mean my way hasn’t worked for me and maybe will for others too… Anyone who knows me on a personal level would back me on this fully including my two children ( now grown up )
I resent anyone insinuating otherwise just because of my past… On the whole I’m happy.. I had something others may not have had to balance the harsh times.. I absolutely fly in my creative realm.. I’m happy and content with my family and have a strong bond with them.. I’ve never had so much as an antidepressant.. The only way to heal something that’s happened in my reality is to deal with it.. not mask it with pills.. that’s my opinion and my belief and I’m entitled to this just the same as the next person is entitled to their opinions and beliefs…
I had my creative mind and an inquiring one at that… The information gleaned over the years allowed me to heal myself and make me who I am today and I’m ok.. Done all the soul searching.. been there done that as they say…
When abuse in any form has happened there needs to be an holistic approach I believe…The system seems to give only one side of it from what I see… I’m not dismissing this side.. it’s very important to have the information to reprogram the brain.. to give another perspective other than your own.. but I believe the real answers along with this info.. lie within each and every one of us… the info helps the left hand side of the brain.. the logical side to make sense of it all.. but this doesn’t deal with all that pent up emotion that’s there as a result.. in a positive way…
Emotion comes from the right side of the brain.. the creative side.. so again my belief is.. this needs to released in a positive way.. any endeavour on the creative front uses the right side of the brain… Emotions.. feelings.. all derive from the right side so no logic can release this aspect.. as the info goes to the left hand side of the brain.. what’s needed I feel.. is to connect both IE: counselling along with creative therapy… I’ll read something for instance and it may be a trigger.. now I’ll recognise it as such and consciously channel the feeling out by doing something creative.. I’ll also play music and sing etc.. all release the emotions felt at the time and leave me feeling blissed out and free.. ” just being ” It’s great… 😀 Guaranteed success… 😀
I do have to control it though.. I used to do gruelling sessions.. not realising even.. how many hours had passed by.. that took it’s toll on me physically in the end… Now I’m in the process of sorting that out… 🙂
This is why now I can step back a bit from the art and focus on healing my body and enjoying my family etc… This is how I’ve got to the point I can write about these things as it may help someone else to help themselves reach a stage in their own life where they find inner peace… 🙂
I don’t pretend to know everything.. I know very little in the big scheme of things.. but what I do know.. is myself and what works for me and you know what? I like me and it took a long time and a lot of work on myself to be able to say this.. but yeh I’m doing just fine… 😀
On that note my painting awaits..! 😀
Have a magical day/eve
Jen. xxx
Lady of the dance.

About Arthouse Wijn-Ton.

Creative being @ Arthouse Wijn-Ton..
This entry was posted in Art garden, Art therapy, Arthouse Wijn-Ton., Arthouse., Aspien woman., Calm in the storm., childhood abuse., CPTSD., Drawing., Fine Art., Healing journey, Interior Design, Landscape gardening, Live music., Music, Oil paintings, Original song., Ornamental garden., Outsider art, Paintings, Poetry..., Pondering., Sculpture, The storm., Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Pondering.. to diversify a little from the previous post…

  1. More wonderful work from you; she looks great. we are blessed to see this Jen. thanks and enjoy a great day and week too. with love, Eddie

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